Becoming an Attractive Woman

Becoming an Attractive Woman

Written by Melissa Marie

What do you believe to be beautiful in a woman? Is it a strong physique, confidence, a talent for being creative, good character, or the way she dresses? Women have a powerful position when it comes to defining beauty: beauty is a powerful asset for women. 

But what constitutes as beauty? For me, the quality of a person’s character determines their beauty, not physical appearance. Thus, the physical appearance is highly important but it should not be vital.

For example, a woman can get a makeover through makeup, hair waxing, tanning, dental work, losing/ gaining weight, changing the wardrobe etc.. and lack good character, therefore, she is not much other than just a pretty thing. On the other hand,  if her beauty emanates from within and she takes care of her physical appearance then she is stunning. 


I was thinking about these things as I sat as a patient in the hospital this week. I had shared a picture of me in a hospital gown and added a captioning about “showing up for life”. It felt odd sharing a photo of me with the public when it was such a low time personally. I suffered a mini-stroke and was admitted on Monday and released on Thursday. My body shook with tremors that left me embarrassed and in pain. Yet I felt I needed to be honest, so I uploaded a picture to Instagram and almost deleted it. 

30077777_206446926796975_386507293832773632_nThe Photo from Instagram that I shared. 

I wanted to delete the photo because I sat in a hospital bed in a borrowed gown feeling glum in body but did not want others in society to look down on me because I am sick. Rather I chose to share my fashioned look but held my head high with lifted spirits. I shared because I truly want to show that just because I could not ‘look’ stunning in a hospital gown does not mean that I had to have a sour demeanor. In the photo above I am smizing, (the super-model term for smiling with your eyes).

As I sat there awaiting doctors and testing, I pondered the question what kind of beauty was I seeking as a woman? It is quite obvious that I am not as attractive in a hospital gown, but I felt good in my spirit. I realized that the woman that I have always wanted to be was the one who responds gracefully to harsh reality or rude people. 

This stroke happened at the oddest time. I sat eating pie at a birthday celebration when the tremors took my body into a seizure type of rhythm. I have been speed walking and doing pilates 2x a week. Why strike when I was at my all-time high? I don’t know, but what I did learn is that ugly and unfortunate things will happen, the only thing I can do is to control my response.  I know easier said than done.

Your Character is Like a Flowering Plant.

This is why it is important to know that true beauty is like a flowering plant.Beauty is about becoming, evolving and doing.  We should be constantly changing in each season. Whether it be the fall season and it is time to work on rooting for the winter to protect us from the harsh cold, or in spring when we burst forth with growth and flowers. Or maybe it is the summer season and we just quench our souls in the summer sun. The point is we must understand that we need to become rather than to shrivel up and die. 

Building a beautiful character takes time and effort. I know for me, one of the greatest struggles is responding kindly to harsh realities. For example, when I went to the emergency room, I was embarrassed by all of the staring people. I received their stares as an insult. I wanted to retort with something ugly, but this is when I felt in my heart that I needed to receive it with grace. I needed to find the positive in a bad situation. For me, the blessing in the curse was that I was able to think on things since I temporarily couldn’t speak clearly.

I thought about you.  I thought about us. How can we effectively become fashioned with stunning beauty? I truly believe it is by fashioning the heart and instilling good character. Changing how we respond to life will enable us to overcome mountains with hope at the top. Staying focused on the inner beauty as much as we fashion the outer appearance, even more so.  

Our challenge is to look within at things we would like to change but don’t forget to harp in on our strengths as well. From our weaknesses, we will grow and from our strengths, we shall triumph! Our root cause is for stunning beauty and fashioning the heart with nothing less than excellence in character.


Proverbs 31:10  Who can find a virtuous woman for her price is far above rubies.



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